Mom SCREAMED at us, she lectured and admonished us – but she never – talked to us. I once heard her say she did not like to talk to kids-but she had 7…
“FINLAND In the 1950s the Finnish government required that all children born to schizophrenic mothers be adopted and raised by non-schizophrenic families. Recent research has demonstrated that the level of communication within the home has a large impact on a child’s development. If the adoptive families’ level of communication is very good, rates of schizophrenia are low amongst children raised in that environment compared to those for children raised in families with poor communication. Studies have shown that the rates for schizophrenia can be as low as one-tenth of those for children raised in families with poor communication. MORE AT: http://www.sampan.org/show_article.php?display=2236
“My niece asked me once, “What do you think is most important in raising children?” Talk to them I said, there is nothing more important than really talking to and listening to them. My oldest brother is severely schizophrenic. He has spent the last 24 years in a N. Y. State forensic hospital, after having killed my grandmother in 1986…
One of my sisters has a dysthymic disorder with frequent major depressive dips (probably bi-polar spectrum). My younger brother and I have been diagnosed, him with bi-polar 11 and me with Bi-polar NOS disorders, I also have an anxiety disorder diagnosis and all of us active alcoholics at one time. I think the early communication element of many mental health disorders has been very under acknowledged in recent years.
I do understand the basis for much of the reticence to acknowledge family interaction elements of many mental illnesses. It is a throwback to the blaming of mothers for the mental health condition of their children, most notable the 1970’s notion of “schizophrenogenic mothers”. This correlation was reported to ‘make’ mother’s feel “blamed”, for the condition of the child. No one can ‘make’ another person feel “blamed”, except themselves as they are free to look at the information and decide if they are to blame or not.
There are two important elements to the “blame game”, one being if I have strong feeling about being “blamed” that I cannot resolve-I need to look at the circumstances much more closely-and perhaps even talk with someone about them. Secondly my obsession with my state of “blame” does nothing for the person who needs help!

Please talk to the kids-weather you are a mother, grandmother, niece, father, neighbor…